There’s a very particular moment when jealousy hits — not loud, not dramatic — just that sharp, sinking feeling in your stomach. Maybe it happens when your friend texts you about another promotion. Or when you see someone on Instagram announcing the engagement you’ve been praying for. Or when someone you love shares good news… and instead of celebrating, your smile feels tight around the edges.

And then the guilt comes.

Not the light kind. The heavy, lingering kind that makes you wonder, “Why did that bother me? What’s wrong with me?”

I’ve felt that sting more times than I want to admit.

In this week’s episode of Take a Shot with Emem Joy Emah, I tell the truth about one particular moment — the day jealousy pushed me into betraying a friend. I can still remember where I was standing, the way my chest was pounding, the words I said that I couldn’t take back. It wasn’t my proudest moment. But it was the beginning of a very real, very humbling conversation with God.

Because jealousy doesn’t usually start with hatred or envy — it starts with fear.

Fear that you’re behind.

Fear that you’ve been forgotten.

Fear that life is passing out blessings and your name wasn’t called.

And when you don’t face that fear, it grows.

Quietly at first.

Then loudly enough to shape how you see yourself.

That’s the part that hurts the most — not the comparison itself, but who you become when comparison takes over.

But here’s the personal truth I share in the episode: the moment I finally stopped pretending I was “fine,” something in me finally softened. It wasn’t instant relief. It wasn’t a miracle moment. It was more like an exhale I didn’t know I’d been holding for years.

And that’s where the real healing began.

In this episode, I walk you through the small, honest steps that helped me climb out of that mental spiral:

• how I started noticing the “warning signs” before jealousy hit,
• the tiny prayer I whispered when comparison tried to twist my thoughts,
• the way God gently showed me the root — not the behavior, but the wound underneath,
• and how choosing gratitude felt awkward at first… but eventually broke something loose inside me.

You’ll hear the parts I wish I could avoid, the parts I’m grateful I lived through, and the parts that finally set me free.

If jealousy has been showing up in your friendships… your marriage… your career… your calling… if you’ve been embarrassed by it, or ashamed of it, or afraid someone will find out — this episode is your safe place. You’re not broken. You’re not “behind.” You’re human. And healing is closer than you think.

If you’re ready to breathe again — really breathe —

here’s your next step:

Watch the full episode here

Listen to the full episode here

You don’t have to carry this weight one more day. Let’s walk this out together.